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Ke Gurun Aku Lari

Ke gurun aku lari, masalahku tetap mengikuti. Ke hutan aku sembunyi, masalahku tetap menghantui. Ke laut aku teriak, masalahku ikut menggema. Kutanya orang bijak, mereka hanya pandai bicara, menggurui dan menghakimi. Kudekap ia erat dalam pelukanku, sampai ia mati kehabisan napas.

I don't like shopping.

Lately it's very rare seeing me coming back home from office without any plastic or paper bag in my hand. One day I came home with 2 plastic bags full of groceries from Cold Storage, a day before I would be rushing home with one paper bag, couldn't wait to try on the new lingerie in that bag. Another day I came home with one pack of chili chicken floss and sweet & spicy grilled cuttlefish. Today I came home holding one plastic bag of Borders with 5 novels in it. Gees..I couldn't believe it sometimes. 

It's not that I like shopping very much. Yes, I like shopping just like any other women but not very much. But as I said, my frequency of shopping is very high lately. Sometimes I feel a bit guilty also knowing that later on I realized that I didn't like that sweet & spicy cuttlefish, or I forgot to drink the milk until the expiry date was due, or even the books I bought previously have not been touched yet and now I already bought other books which I don't know when I'm going to read them. 

If I'm not very fond of shopping, why do I do that then? It's just because I feel so lonely I guess, I don't know what to do, then I just go roaming around the mall and usually end up in one corner of shop. I try to cope the loneliness with that "very positive" activity. To fill my solitary walks with something that can distract my solitude. That's all.  


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